So it occurred to me today that the majority of the postings on this blog are about romantic relationships and although that is what many people would equate with love, there are so many other experiences in which love can be expressed in the world. Love can be shown from friends, bosses, co-workers, family and by complete strangers. The past couple of months I have been shown this type of love and I felt that it was important to acknowledge it here. So if I may...

Last month I wrote about my gratitude for the straight allies in our lives. This post is a piggy-back if you will but from a different angle. Upon thinking about how blessed I have been since late July this year, I have spent much time reflecting on the last year. As I said in my last post I was heavily and continually discriminated against at my last place of employment, to the extent of my job being threatened all because of my sexuality. Thankfully I was not fired and was able to part ways on my terms but the profoundly negative experiences I had there have definitely left me scarred. My self-esteem and confidence have been affected both personally and professionally and I am still working through a lot of hurt and anger, ultimately trying to let go, forgive and heal.

All things considered I am lucky. Despite these experiences, I have never been physically assaulted or cut off from anyone in my life, events that are still all too common within the LGTBQI community. After experiencing what I have, I realized that one of my great loves had been deeply affected as well. My love for teaching. Since I was a child I knew I wanted to become a teacher and the first three years of my career were for the most part, joyous. I love educating and connecting with students. Especially with the 'at-risk' population that I have concentrated on.

Because of the year I had, I became desperate and began contemplating other options. Anything that would get me out of the situation I was in. I thought I wanted to go back to school to pursue a different career and I eventually took a very difficult job on a whim just so I wouldn't have to return. I can honestly say that I had never felt so desperate in my life. Thankfully my current job literally fell in my lap and I was able to resume teaching.

My current employer recognizes and has protections of LGTBQI individuals in writing and they take discrimination very seriously. Unfortunately some of my students still express homophobic comments and initially I was unsure of how to handle the situation. I decided that I needed to go to my boss and discuss my concerns with her. Although I was terrified and exhausted with dealing this issue, I was not willing to compromise my beliefs and well-being or repeat my past situation. When I told my boss what was happening, she was appalled and took immediate action. I started to cry and said that it meant so much to be able to do what I love for a living and to finally be supported while doing it. There was a period not so long ago where I thought this wouldn't be possible and I would have to give up on my dream.

Like my boss, my co-workers are so supportive. Even though we may not see eye to eye on every situation we are still able to discuss our thoughts and feelings in a mature, respectful way. Honestly I am still in shock and unused to experiencing such overwhelming support. I have talked with my boss a couple of times about discrimination and I still dismiss it with the fact that some of society is still homophobic and making homophobic terms is more acceptable and she cut me off and said, "no, it isn't." This warms my heart.

I guess my message with this post is that you don't have to give up on your dream, or what you love if you have experienced discrimination. There are people out there that will accept you for who you are and stand up for you in the face of hate and intolerance. I just read an article in USA Today about a transsexual woman who at the age of 50 is playing basketball for a college despite the many odds that are stacked against her.

Admittedly I have been on the fence about the whole "It Gets Better" campaign. Don't get me wrong, I so appreciate all the work that Dan Savage has done and the movement that has resulted; but, that doesn't take away from the fact that when it sucks in the moment, it really sucks and looking to the future seems impossible. Fortunately I do know from personal experience that it does get better and that one should not give into bullies or bigots because their views are flawed on so many different levels.

All this to say, hold onto what you love. Don't sacrifice what you love despite the hate that is out there. You owe it to yourself to stay true to yourself. Yes I almost gave up and I am so glad that I didn't. My whole life has been changed by this job-my mental, physical and emotional health have all improved. Now this is not to say that one should stay in an unsafe, unhealthy environment. Get out! No one deserves to endure constant discrimination. Ever. Period. But seek out other options. They are out there.

Speaking from experience, sometimes I become short sighted and frustrated that change isn't happening fast enough; but it is happening. Today there are 10 states in which there is marriage equality not to mention there are a record number of out legislatures in all different areas of government. Professional athletes are coming out in support of the LGTBQI community and condemning homophobia in traditionally male dominated areas including football. Bottom line, the times are changing and things are getting better. Slowly. I have to remind myself of this when I become too passionate...

Yes it is exhausting, humiliating, demoralizing and infuriating to have to constantly defend yourself and fight for your freedom, but in my experience, it is worth it. Although I endured hell I know that I made differences. Coworkers told me that they used to be ignorant of LGTBQI issues but after speaking with me they became more sensitive. Students who presented as being overtly homophobic continued to hug me daily after they found out about my sexuality. I am not advocating that everyone take on the fight to change minds; but I will encourage people to stay true to who they are. No matter what. Of course stay safe and I don't think everything should be viewed as a fight, but for me, these encounters became small victories that were game changing. Sure I could not change the place that I worked for, but I could change minds, one at a time and that was equally as important.

At the end of the day you are all wonderful, beautiful, strong, courageous individuals and my admiration for you is endless. If you are currently struggling in a situation, don't give up. There are other options out there. Have hope that you will find one that works for you. Don't let anyone take what you love away from you. Fight the good fight, whatever that may be for you and stay true to you.

I am a huge Greek mythology nerd and one of my favorite myths is the myth of Pandora. We have all heard of her infamous box and how her curiosity overcame her and she opened the box that she was instructed not to. As she opened the box,   all of the evils that we know in the world today escaped. Sorrow, hunger, pain, war, the list goes on. What is not mentioned more often however is that Pandora was able to close the box just before the last things escaped. That last thing was hope and because she saved it, humans were able to have hope despite all of the world's evils.

The Greeks, like many cultures, believed in myths in order to explain what is not known or understood. The world's evils are most certainly not understood and are quite difficult to comprehend. Sometimes I become overwhelmed with how evil this world can seem and how prolific pain is. For me though, hope is a huge saving grace because from what I have experienced through hope, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I believe that hope and love go hand in hand. When we love, we hope that we will be taken care of and safe. When we hope, we hope that we will find love and be loved.

Sometimes life can be so difficult it seems unbearable. When this happens, maintain hope. Know that you are not alone and there are hundreds like you who know what you are going though. Through hope they were able to survive and find their love, romantic, professional, or otherwise. Through hope, maintaining and having love is in fact possible.

Mia