Just keep loving
By: Just Me
Me: Mom I...I'm bisexual
Mom: It's okay....your sister was anorexic. I still love you.

I was 17 when I came out to my parents but I had known for years. All of my friends knew that I loved the ladies but kissed boys because it was easier, well I guess I mean they were easier. Women are beautiful, mysterious, sexy, complicated, and the only gender I could actually see myself falling in love with.

There wasn't a single moment that I fell in love with her but more of a continual growing magnetic urge to be around her. Two problems though; she was my boss and she was married...to a man.

It wasn't supposed to happen, it shouldn't have happened and neither of us asked for it to happen. But it did. She needed a shoulder to talk to. Not cry on she isn't a crier like I am. There were things going on in her life that nobody seemed to notice or care about. Her friends never seemed to notice that she was sad. Just because someone is obnoxiously outgoing and confident doesn't mean they are happy. How did her friends not see what she was really feeling? I guess that is how we first connected.

Then it turned sexual. Just a peck on the lips when she dropped me off at home after I had too many beers to drive but not enough to make a move myself. She kissed me and I thought, 'huh, odd.' That was all and I shut the passenger door and went inside. Then came the flirting.

Flirting is so dangerous and exciting and in this case, the point of no return. I couldn't help but flirt back when she looked at me or push into her when she walked by. After a night of bar drinking she decided to accompany me home while I walked my bike. We extended the twenty minute walk into a three hour very exciting make-out-on-top-of-cars midnight stroll. Our connection was sexual and hidden but I always knew she would become my forever. I know you won't believe it and that is totally fine, but I do have morals I just couldn't listen to one of them for a little bit of time. They say you can't control who you love and I believe that because I lived through it. I lost friends, broke people's trust and everybody told me I ruined a marriage. Guilt washed over me constantly but the love washed over me endlessly more. I breathed it in and out when something hurt too much and waited patiently for the final outcome. We say our anniversary is SF PRIDE 2009 because that is when we could finally live the life we were meant to share together.

The Gay Ending

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