Obviously I want to talk about an incident that happened in my first sober relationship. How we met is a whole nother story in of itself; but here it is in a nutshell.

There was a Boy and he was 6 months sober. He went out for a pass from the Jewish Rehab he found himself in and did nothing what his pass said he was going to do. His day pass said he was going to go have lunch with his family and meet up with friends to go to an AA meeting and then be back to the rehab for dinner. Instead, the Boy whisked himself away to his Garden of Eden, which he lovingly calls, The Flex. For those of you not familiar with The Flex, it is an establishment that requires the patrons to solely wear towels, which are optional. It was a lovely Sunday and this young Boy was going there merely to lay naked by the pool and for the weekly BBQ that was offered, not to participate in any shenanigans. It was his first time back at one of these establishments sober, and he was in parking ticket mode. He was the parking ticket and he wanted validation, but didn't want to get stamped!

He was making his way to the pool for the BBQ, when he saw the most delicious apple bottom ass he had ever seen. He stopped walking to imagine what it would be like to taste it. Before he was done fantasizing, the apple bottom turned around and caught the Boy staring with his toungue out. Embarrassed, the Boy makes it seem like he had stopped to open the steam room door, which he had mercifully stopped in front of. Before entering the steam room, he dropped his towel ever so slightly to reveal his crack and gives the apple bottom man a quick little inviting smile.

Embarrassed and flustered he calmed himself down in the steam room and in walked Apple Bottom. From the first moment he met Apple Bottom, his aggressive and dominant behavior was so appealing to the Boy. So the two of them were standing by the wall in the steam room and Apple Bottom reaches over ever so subtly and gives the Boy's jewels a little jiggle. It was an invitation that the Boy was all too ready to accept. Apple Bottom guided the boy to a cubby and they proceeded to put on a show for the other steam room patrons.

Having gotten validated and realizing a stamp was coming sooner than he would like, the Boy fled and wandered off to see what else was around, ready to get validated once more. After a couple of laps around, little results produced. The Boy entered the video room of this fine establishment and across the room he saw Apple Bottom pleasuring another patron. The Boy is a voyeur and was immensely satisfied to sit there and watch the live porn. To the Boy's excitement, his ticket was validated once again by Apple Bottom by beckoning him over to join in on the fun. The Boy was very happy to see Apple Bottom send away the other guy and give his sole attention to him. If you haven't already guessed it by now, the Boy likes to be the zebra in the African Safari, being pounced on and devoured by a hungry lion.

Apple Bottom whispered, "do you have a room?" and the Boy told him a small fib and said, "no." Fearing that if he said yes,  Apple Bottom would want to go to it and would want to stamp the Boy's ticket or have the boy stamp his ticket, and he was not ready for that! The Boy realized that it was once again time to flee and ran off, leaving the lion hungry and wanting more.

Looking at the time, the Boy realized that it was time to leave his Garden of Eden. Satisfied and validated he headed to his room to change. Once again, because he likes to be objectified, he left his door open while he got dressed. And who should pass by, but Apple Bottom?! The Boy was impressed with the fact that Apple Bottom did not call him out on his little white lie; instead, Apple Bottom said, "hold on a minute," and rushed off and quickly returned with his business card. The card had a sunflower on it, which just so happened to be the Boy's favorite flower.

Apple Bottom, whom the Boy now learned was named Tripp, handed him his card and said very directly, "call  me."

The Boy's sponsor had been encouraging him to get more numbers as a part of his program of recovery and so something deep inside the Boy told him he should call Tripp back. They set up their first date, very cryptic-like, fore the Boy had still not disclosed that he was six months sober and living in a Jewish Rehab. While trying to plan their first date, it was revealed that Tripp was five years sober and did not care much that the Boy was in rehab.

If you haven't guessed, I am the Boy and I had just heard at group of this concept of a "God Shot", which means that there are no coincidences-that something that seems random is in fact meant to be and is an indicator of a loving higher power working in your life. It's kind of like Pee-Wee Herman saying, "Connect the dots la la la la la!" All these random dots, make one complete picture, yet we are only able to see the dots. So this God Shot was that Tripp was five years sober. So all of my fears of disclosing my addiction were lifted and it was a safe place for me to explore romance sober.

We were very lesbionic and six months later we moved in together. I moved into his tiny single, which we called, "The Love Cave". There was no doubt that this person and I were meant to be together at that time in that moment. I was uncertain if I loved him in the "movie-romantic" way, but there was no doubt that he loved me unconditionally and I grew to do the same.

After my first year and a half, my dependence on him, just as my safety net, lifted and I was truly able to love him and give equally into the relationship. We were together for three and a half years and in our second year together, I developed seven Kidney Stones. This was a direct result of my Crystal Meth use. The drugs had eroded my ureter and made it so that little to no pee was getting into my kidneys and so I developed the stones. Tripp was there for me, to do something I had never done before, and never thought possible. To trust and depend on someone who was not family for support.

The surgery had gone well but my recovery was very difficult, due to my stubbornness of not wanting to take my prescribed pain medication in fear of relapsing. By not taking the medicine, I placed my body in so much pain and stress that the stint that was placed in my body shifted down to make it where I could no longer control my own bodily functions. Without a complaint, he was there, mopping up the goop, despite the gore. And believe me! It was not pretty!! And when I needed to be rushed to the hospital, due to infection, he took the lead again, like the lion I met in the bathouse. Instead of being his prey, I was his cub that he dragged to saftey.

I was very emabarrassed because I was continuously going to the bathroom and had to wear adult diapers and was worried that I would make a mess all over his car. He just smiled and reclined the seat so I could ride in comfort. On the way to the hospital I was in a lot of pain and stress, doing my best to hold everything in. Eventually I could not control it anymore and my body exploded. I looked at his face to see what he was thinking, and all I saw was a big smile and a laugh. No pity, no disgust, no shame. Just strength. I'll never forget that intense feeling of not being alone and being completely and utterly cared for and loved. And then I started laughing and letting my body go and having a good time. We cranked up the music and I pissed and shat to the music the rest of the way lol.

Even though a year and a half later, Tripp would display that he was human and selfish and bring about the end of our relationship. I will never forget that moment in the car and the gift he gave me. I felt unconditionally loved and cared for by a power greater than myself. The same kind of unconditional love my sponsor kept telling me I would get from my higher power, God, but did not feel it or understand it. When we broke up, I realized that I had made Tripp my higher power, but that in reality my higher power, or God as I choose to call him, had always been there and was always there working for me. Thanks to Tripp, I was able to experience the gift of trusting in that force for the first time. It is a gift that I cherish deeply and has allowed me to walk this Earth with a sense of faith and security that I had not known before.

Nick